Hi All,
So I thought I might take some time to explain what I was doing to try and lose weight before I choose the opertation, first stop, Weight Watchers!
I believe that WW is actually a great way of trying to lose weight, it works for a lot of people but why didn't it work for me?
WW Worked (at the time back in Jan 2006) by calorie pointing food, you were allocated X amounts of points per day to eat based on your BMI, weight, height and sex. For me being a 22yo male 208kgs (457.6lbs) and 183cms I was allocated 33 points per day to use. With help from mum we worked out a plan that worked for me, because I had finished my Diploma at Tafe and was looking for work I decided to spend the time at the gym doing 4-5 days 1-2 hour sessions. I know what your thinking now "it's all well and good if you can spend that much time and energy everyday at the gym however the average "working" person does not have this luxury and we get by doing what we can" I understand that, hell WW even understands that and that's what's great about WW, if you can put in as much exercise as possible and you count your points you will have a great chance of losing weight.
My past blog was about calorie counting and I mentioned that I had to eat less than 2000 calories a day to lose 2.5kgs (5.5lbs) a week with some general exercise, this is basically what WW does, they calorie count for you and do this part so you can lose weight with minimal effort, well until you plateau then your on your own, at least that was my experience. For those wondering I lost 35kgs (77lbs).
Now please take note this was how WW worked back in 2006, I have heard that they have changed the way they count foods and something about how you don't count points anymore but you eat certain food groups X amounts of times per day. Whatever I really don't care to be honest with you, I was treated like garbage when I asked for help when I plateaued, I would rather not go into it but WW employees only read from the books provided, don't you dare ask them anything that isn't part of their fairy tale story of weight loss.
Enough of that, so June comes around and I'm wasting money with WW so I ditch them, stack the weight back on (as you do) and a good mate of mine tells me he wants me to Gym with him (yes Gym is now a verb!), come late 2007 and we do this, problem is he lives about 20kms (about 12miles) away and I don't drive, as good as that was it didn't work out, he had to drive me home after each session and the cost of fuel got excessively high. In that time I lose about 25kgs (55lbs) and my mate about 20kgs (40lbs) himself we both put the weight back on (and then some).
The above paragraph pretty much explains my title 2007 - Ups and Downs to weight loss and 2008 - Losing weight with a mate!
Ups and downs of weight loss, what a drag, get into a good routine then bam you plateau, you have to keep your body forever changing, never let it get used to what you are doing, change your food, exercise and routines, easier said than done indeed!
Back in 2005 (after the heart attack scare) I was asked by my GP if I was interested in this brand new gastric banding operation (Lap Band) which assisted with weight loss by placing a band around your stomach so when you eat a smaller portion of your stomach digests the food before it hits the acidic area for breakdown, because you eat into a small pouch you fill up quicker and don't eat as much, at that time I turned him down telling him I wanted to try and do this myself and not go for any assistance options that may have been available, he was reluctant but agreed it was worth me trying on my own.
To be honest with you I hadn't had a chance to lose weight on my own, I wanted to give it all a go, it was new to me, it was exciting, I would watch the Biggest Loser and get motivated then go and workout myself, it was these failures that I had to experience to finally accept that I needed a more permanent solution to my problem...
2009 - Backed into a corner, nowhere to run!
2010 - Acceptance, the hardest decision made!
The next blog is going to be about the two above topics, to summarise let's start with how I failed the prerequisites to the lap banding operation, how I managed to gain weight while on OptiFast and my experiences with depression, oh the joys this will bring to my lovely readers.
It's going to be a very personal Blog this next one, there are so many things in my head that I need to put down on paper or talk to somebody about, I've been told to see a psychiatrist for these issues but I'm interested in seeing if this ends up being therapeutic for me.
Rest assured though I won't go into too much just enough to not pass that 4th wall but enough to hopefully help others who may feel or felt this way.
Thanks for reading,
Big Age.
Remember any questions or comments you can email me directly evileldrin@gmail.com or add me on facebook if you haven't already you can find me under Adrian Cuvello
Saturday, 28 January 2012
Tuesday, 24 January 2012
Blog 6, Why was 6 scared of 7? Because 7, 8, 9 =) oh portion sizes and calorie counting!
Hi All,
Portion Sizes and calorie counting, so I briefly ran over my past blogs to make sure I haven't talked about this yet and it looks like I haven't.
It took me about 6 months till I was able to begin exercising and I didn't start personal training sessions till the 12 month mark, as previously mentioned this whole experience is about listening and feeling your body so of course everybody heals differently.
I wanted to touch on portion sizes pre and post operation and calorie intake per day as of about 1 month ago when I took notice of how little I was eating.
I never ate the wrong foods, I wasn't a big fan of fast food or deep fried, I just ate too much when I did eat. The standard dinner for the family would be spaghetti for example. Lean mince, canned tomatoes and pasta pre made, the only thing better than this would be fresh ingredients from the backyard.
Where Daniel and Mum would eat 1 average sized bowl and Dad would go for half of a second here's what I would consume (yeah that's a good word I like that), 2-3 full bowls including 4-6 pieces of white bread and probably half a bottle of a diet soft drink.
Today I rarely eat pasta because I have difficulty digesting any food that expands after eating, anything with yeast or self raising qualities such as: Bread, noodles, pasta, rice, lasagna, cupcakes, cake so on and so forth you get the idea. So these days I eat mainly wholemeal pita bread and gluten free products.
Now on the odd day that I do end up eating pasta I would eat about half of one bowl full.
Yup that's right, the pasta expands when it hits my stomach, because mine is so small now it fills me quicker by expanding, thing is about 75% of the time I would have problems with that type of food and get sick from it so I just stay away it's easier.
Another great example is chicken, during my time of scar tissue healing I was told to keep up the protean and a good amount every day so I would have it for lunch.
Before the operation I would consume half a chicken and chips, now I'm not talking about any commercial chicken I mean one of those smaller more generous chicken places that would serve you up 2 to 3 ladles of chips with the chicken, then I would look for something else in about an hour.
Now days it's a quarter chicken, skinless, breast with sauce to keep it moist.
An interesting thing to mention that I found out from my surgeon is that when he did my operation he used polyester stitching which never dissolves in the body, (unlike today where he uses something else that does) so my stomach day by day swells by this stitching because it is a foreign object in my body it will never completely accept it, this will never change I will live with this for the rest of my life.
The following is how each day is different due to the swelling; day 1 I have cereal, quarter chicken, half bowl of spaghetti, day 2 where I can eat is like this; cereal as usual, half a chicken, snacks such as protean bars/shake or a decent (big) packet of chips, full bowl of spaghetti then more protean shakes after dinner. When I don't have swelling I can eat excessive amounts of food, at most 2-3 times what I usually eat! It's crazy.
Now the exact opposite also happens where my stomach swells up more than usual and my day consists of this; half the usual cereal, if I'm lucky a quarter chicken and 3 mouthfuls of the spaghetti.
How do I know when one of these occurs? When I take my morning pills, if I have trouble with the 1 mouthful of water I drink to take them it's a "Bad" day, if I can take 2 mouthfuls and it hurts a little it's a "Standard" day and if I can take 2 and 3 with no problems whatsoever it's a "Good" day! Note: I like "Good" days =)
So calories hey? I got an iPhone application recently from a work colleague that tells me how many calories I'm eating with each piece of food I eat, turns out the results are as follows:
Before the operation I was eating around 8500 calories a day and burning about 3000 from walking, moving around, that's still 5000 calories I'm not loosing each day.
Post operation:
Standard Day: 1200 calories
Bad Day: 600-700 calories
Good Day: 2500 - 3000 calories
To continue burning 2.5kgs a week I need to eat less than 2000 calories and burn at least 500 per day, each time I go to the gym for a workout I burn the at least 400 calories.
So even on a good day I will continue to lose huge amounts of weight, but will I ever plateau?
Since I have started to build muscle I have slowed down to half a kilo (1 pound) to nothing a week which is great but what am I actually doing to stop it?
Eating meat pies, eating all the bad food we all love to hate, that's right people, I get to eat junk food!
I cannot eat that kind of food every day though, I haven't touched a meat pie in about 3 weeks now, last time I had something bad would be the chicken schnitzel on Sunday, once again instead of eating 6 all in sandwiches I eat 2 (if I'm lucky) with nothing but sauce and cheese, oh there only about 120gram pieces, which is very small.
Apart from the occasional binge of junk food muscle weighs twice as much as fat does, so when I don't lose weight it means I gained muscle about 2-3kgs of muscle to be exact a month which is about average to just over I believe, I'll have to check that. So yes if I wasn't building muscle I would still be losing 6-8 kgs a month, it's a little scary because I don't know what my body will do as it get's closer to my goal of 98kgs.
Only time will tell.
Thanks for reading,
Big Age.
Remember any questions or comments you can email me directly evileldrin@gmail.com or add me on facebook if you haven't already you can find me under Adrian Cuvello
Portion Sizes and calorie counting, so I briefly ran over my past blogs to make sure I haven't talked about this yet and it looks like I haven't.
It took me about 6 months till I was able to begin exercising and I didn't start personal training sessions till the 12 month mark, as previously mentioned this whole experience is about listening and feeling your body so of course everybody heals differently.
I wanted to touch on portion sizes pre and post operation and calorie intake per day as of about 1 month ago when I took notice of how little I was eating.
I never ate the wrong foods, I wasn't a big fan of fast food or deep fried, I just ate too much when I did eat. The standard dinner for the family would be spaghetti for example. Lean mince, canned tomatoes and pasta pre made, the only thing better than this would be fresh ingredients from the backyard.
Where Daniel and Mum would eat 1 average sized bowl and Dad would go for half of a second here's what I would consume (yeah that's a good word I like that), 2-3 full bowls including 4-6 pieces of white bread and probably half a bottle of a diet soft drink.
Today I rarely eat pasta because I have difficulty digesting any food that expands after eating, anything with yeast or self raising qualities such as: Bread, noodles, pasta, rice, lasagna, cupcakes, cake so on and so forth you get the idea. So these days I eat mainly wholemeal pita bread and gluten free products.
Now on the odd day that I do end up eating pasta I would eat about half of one bowl full.
Yup that's right, the pasta expands when it hits my stomach, because mine is so small now it fills me quicker by expanding, thing is about 75% of the time I would have problems with that type of food and get sick from it so I just stay away it's easier.
Another great example is chicken, during my time of scar tissue healing I was told to keep up the protean and a good amount every day so I would have it for lunch.
Before the operation I would consume half a chicken and chips, now I'm not talking about any commercial chicken I mean one of those smaller more generous chicken places that would serve you up 2 to 3 ladles of chips with the chicken, then I would look for something else in about an hour.
Now days it's a quarter chicken, skinless, breast with sauce to keep it moist.
An interesting thing to mention that I found out from my surgeon is that when he did my operation he used polyester stitching which never dissolves in the body, (unlike today where he uses something else that does) so my stomach day by day swells by this stitching because it is a foreign object in my body it will never completely accept it, this will never change I will live with this for the rest of my life.
The following is how each day is different due to the swelling; day 1 I have cereal, quarter chicken, half bowl of spaghetti, day 2 where I can eat is like this; cereal as usual, half a chicken, snacks such as protean bars/shake or a decent (big) packet of chips, full bowl of spaghetti then more protean shakes after dinner. When I don't have swelling I can eat excessive amounts of food, at most 2-3 times what I usually eat! It's crazy.
Now the exact opposite also happens where my stomach swells up more than usual and my day consists of this; half the usual cereal, if I'm lucky a quarter chicken and 3 mouthfuls of the spaghetti.
How do I know when one of these occurs? When I take my morning pills, if I have trouble with the 1 mouthful of water I drink to take them it's a "Bad" day, if I can take 2 mouthfuls and it hurts a little it's a "Standard" day and if I can take 2 and 3 with no problems whatsoever it's a "Good" day! Note: I like "Good" days =)
So calories hey? I got an iPhone application recently from a work colleague that tells me how many calories I'm eating with each piece of food I eat, turns out the results are as follows:
Before the operation I was eating around 8500 calories a day and burning about 3000 from walking, moving around, that's still 5000 calories I'm not loosing each day.
Post operation:
Standard Day: 1200 calories
Bad Day: 600-700 calories
Good Day: 2500 - 3000 calories
To continue burning 2.5kgs a week I need to eat less than 2000 calories and burn at least 500 per day, each time I go to the gym for a workout I burn the at least 400 calories.
So even on a good day I will continue to lose huge amounts of weight, but will I ever plateau?
Since I have started to build muscle I have slowed down to half a kilo (1 pound) to nothing a week which is great but what am I actually doing to stop it?
Eating meat pies, eating all the bad food we all love to hate, that's right people, I get to eat junk food!
I cannot eat that kind of food every day though, I haven't touched a meat pie in about 3 weeks now, last time I had something bad would be the chicken schnitzel on Sunday, once again instead of eating 6 all in sandwiches I eat 2 (if I'm lucky) with nothing but sauce and cheese, oh there only about 120gram pieces, which is very small.
Apart from the occasional binge of junk food muscle weighs twice as much as fat does, so when I don't lose weight it means I gained muscle about 2-3kgs of muscle to be exact a month which is about average to just over I believe, I'll have to check that. So yes if I wasn't building muscle I would still be losing 6-8 kgs a month, it's a little scary because I don't know what my body will do as it get's closer to my goal of 98kgs.
Only time will tell.
Thanks for reading,
Big Age.
Remember any questions or comments you can email me directly evileldrin@gmail.com or add me on facebook if you haven't already you can find me under Adrian Cuvello
Wednesday, 18 January 2012
Blog 5, Ben and Dylan contributed to my life change.
Hi Everyone,
I promise not to make this one another sappy story it's actually a good one, one of the many reasons I wanted to change my life and the reason why I haven't seen these guys in almost 3 years now...
So there's a band out there called Rainshadow, they're a local Melbourne "Dark Rock" band, you can find them here "www.facebook.com/rainshadow", now I've known the singer (Ben) via the web since 2007 then Dylan their guitarist a few months after at one of their shows, we all seemed to hit it off pretty well.
Come 2008 (sometime) and I head off to the Arthouse (before they closed their doors) in Nth Melbourne to check these guys out and also some other bands, I turned up a little early and saw Ben out front, we had a quick chat and he asked if I would be interested in having dinner with the guys, I refused his offer telling him I was waiting for a friend to arrive.
I lied...
Why? Because that night I could barely hold my own weight I had pain in my lower back so bad that my usual 3-4 panodine fortes didn't help, between bands I had to take a seat and rest my ankles and I couldn't stop sweating, it was a bad night to say the least and before the night was out I would be in tears from the pain.
Turns out photos were taken of the night and one of me, here it is. http://imgur.com/9TcZF
I was told by the gentleman who took the photo that I looked "deep in thought", the truth being that I was actually angry with myself, I hated every minute that I was standing that night and it shows in this picture.
Another thing to notice was that I grew my beards, something to hide behind I guess, perhaps just covering my oversized neck? Or the excess amount of fat around my esophagus.
I always look back on this picture, it reminds me of where I was, one of the bad moments I lived through yet at the same token one of the best because it was incidents like this that made me choose to make a difference and for that I am great-full to have experienced it.
I really wanted to tell Ben and Dylan this, I really wanted to tell them I was sorry for lying to them, I hope that reading this now they maybe able to forgive me, perhaps it's just me being a little too humble however this was something I have to get off my chest.
So come today how did I move on from this? Well I haven't yet, in fact in March these guys are playing "http://www.facebook.com/events/228479527231170/" I will be attending that show where I hope to be able to talk to Ben and Dylan about that night and perhaps my journey (I know Dylan has been reading these), also meet and greet the other members I've been talking to their new bassist for a few days now that should be awesome.
I plan to take many pictures this time around, pictures of me with a smile and shaved face with the blokes that contributed to me changing my life ... forever.
Thanks for reading,
Big Age.
Remember any questions or comments you can email me directly evileldrin@gmail.com or add me on facebook if you haven't already you can find me under Adrian Cuvello
I promise not to make this one another sappy story it's actually a good one, one of the many reasons I wanted to change my life and the reason why I haven't seen these guys in almost 3 years now...
So there's a band out there called Rainshadow, they're a local Melbourne "Dark Rock" band, you can find them here "www.facebook.com/rainshadow", now I've known the singer (Ben) via the web since 2007 then Dylan their guitarist a few months after at one of their shows, we all seemed to hit it off pretty well.
Come 2008 (sometime) and I head off to the Arthouse (before they closed their doors) in Nth Melbourne to check these guys out and also some other bands, I turned up a little early and saw Ben out front, we had a quick chat and he asked if I would be interested in having dinner with the guys, I refused his offer telling him I was waiting for a friend to arrive.
I lied...
Why? Because that night I could barely hold my own weight I had pain in my lower back so bad that my usual 3-4 panodine fortes didn't help, between bands I had to take a seat and rest my ankles and I couldn't stop sweating, it was a bad night to say the least and before the night was out I would be in tears from the pain.
Turns out photos were taken of the night and one of me, here it is. http://imgur.com/9TcZF
I was told by the gentleman who took the photo that I looked "deep in thought", the truth being that I was actually angry with myself, I hated every minute that I was standing that night and it shows in this picture.
Another thing to notice was that I grew my beards, something to hide behind I guess, perhaps just covering my oversized neck? Or the excess amount of fat around my esophagus.
I always look back on this picture, it reminds me of where I was, one of the bad moments I lived through yet at the same token one of the best because it was incidents like this that made me choose to make a difference and for that I am great-full to have experienced it.
I really wanted to tell Ben and Dylan this, I really wanted to tell them I was sorry for lying to them, I hope that reading this now they maybe able to forgive me, perhaps it's just me being a little too humble however this was something I have to get off my chest.
So come today how did I move on from this? Well I haven't yet, in fact in March these guys are playing "http://www.facebook.com/events/228479527231170/" I will be attending that show where I hope to be able to talk to Ben and Dylan about that night and perhaps my journey (I know Dylan has been reading these), also meet and greet the other members I've been talking to their new bassist for a few days now that should be awesome.
I plan to take many pictures this time around, pictures of me with a smile and shaved face with the blokes that contributed to me changing my life ... forever.
Thanks for reading,
Big Age.
Remember any questions or comments you can email me directly evileldrin@gmail.com or add me on facebook if you haven't already you can find me under Adrian Cuvello
Thursday, 12 January 2012
Blog 4, 2005 - Heart attack scare (turns out it was acid reflux)
So why is it that we as a human race wait for something drastic to occur before we take action? Why are we so reactive in life and not proactive? If you are a proactive person then give yourself a pat on the back there aren't enough people like you in this world. *thumbs up*
So these days I'm becoming more and more proactive and not waiting for opportunities whether it be music, work or just general life, but I wasn't always this way, July 29th 2005 was one of those days.
Why do I remember the date? Well no, not because this event occurred on a this day but because it was my brothers birthday, Happy B'day bro, now go call 000 cause I'm having a heart attack.
I started my weight loss journey in 2006 so before Weight Watchers and gyming it out I was just a tafe student learning to become an IT technician, on this particular day I cooked my (at the time) favorite meal 2 minute noodles! Turns out it's not my favorite anymore because I can't stomach noodles.
About 15 minutes after eating these noodles I felt a tightness in my chest, I naturally freaked out and began hyperventilating and then sweating profusely, I went pale and felt like passing out.
While I was feeling this tightness in my chest I began walking around trying to stretch it out but nothing seemed to work, I scared myself into getting more sick and screamed to my brother for help, by the time I muttered out what was going on he was frantic, he didn't know what to do, he was so upset he was asking me what do I do? He threw a wet rag over my forehead and called mum at work asking her what to do, eventually the answer was call 000 ill come straight home.
Daniel then called 000 and told them what was happening, after he hung up he put his forehead against mine and told me I would be ok, he was shaking so much, crying and frightened, I didn't know what to do so I just grabbed his hand and apologies to him, told him I loved him and said sorry over and over again, then promised him I would do something about the weight.
I don't remember him saying anything else till mum came home.
By the time mum got home (which was about 10 minutes) I was feeling better, a few minutes later the paramedics and a mica crew turned up with a 3 lead ECG and checked my vitals, turns out my heart was not the cause of my condition, they offered to take me to hospital and I spent the night there. That reminds me... I have access to my own pcr at work, I know who the paramedics were I would like to personally thank them for what they did for me, they do such amazing work as do the nurses, SES, fire fighters, police, army and anybody that assists the community, you are the proactive people in this world and I am great full for what you all do for us.
Turns out I was discharged with acid reflux, this is when the acid from your stomach climbs up your esophagus and burns you which I'm assuming causes your muscles to tense up or cramp around the area, just like heart burn but worse. I believe they call excessive episodes of this GERD and coincidentally the latest fix for this problem is a gastric bypass because as mentioned in previous blogs your stomach containing your acids are no longer connected to your esophagus thus it's impossible for anyone with the operation to get reflux, heartburn or GERD that doesn't stop anxiety rearing it's ugly head around the corner from time to time however.
That following day I spoke to my brother about what had happened and I said to him that this was the last straw I needed to lose the weight, I couldn't put anybody in that position again, he just looked at me and said "Give it 2 weeks you will forget this happened", I was reluctant to believe him, "when you are ready to lose weight you will lose it, till then just be mindful of those of us who love you, we don't want to see you go through this again and we don't want to experience it again".
A few weeks later I was back to my normal routine and had forgotten about what had happened, well I hadn't quite forgotten it just pushed it back into my mind.
So we fast forward to today, Daniel is proud of what I have accomplished, each time I go to the gym he's always telling me I don't need to go, he says I look fantastic and don't need to improve myself anymore than I already have, he is ecstatic that I now have a life to live and can finally go and live it, so I started with America October 2011, but that story comes later :)
This journey is far from over, physically I have healed from my pain, mentally though not so much and bringing up memories such as this breaks my heart to think about it let alone remembering as much detail as possible to write down, it hurts so much my shirt is covered in tears now, perhaps I should clean myself up and get ready for bed, another big day at work tomorrow.
For what it's worth Daniel, you may not have always been there for me when I was younger, you are my big brother but you never did hold my hand growing up, but when I needed you the most ... you were there for me from the very depths of my heart, that place where no words can every express my gratitude, sometimes the only proper words to say are Thank You and I love you.
So these days I'm becoming more and more proactive and not waiting for opportunities whether it be music, work or just general life, but I wasn't always this way, July 29th 2005 was one of those days.
Why do I remember the date? Well no, not because this event occurred on a this day but because it was my brothers birthday, Happy B'day bro, now go call 000 cause I'm having a heart attack.
I started my weight loss journey in 2006 so before Weight Watchers and gyming it out I was just a tafe student learning to become an IT technician, on this particular day I cooked my (at the time) favorite meal 2 minute noodles! Turns out it's not my favorite anymore because I can't stomach noodles.
About 15 minutes after eating these noodles I felt a tightness in my chest, I naturally freaked out and began hyperventilating and then sweating profusely, I went pale and felt like passing out.
While I was feeling this tightness in my chest I began walking around trying to stretch it out but nothing seemed to work, I scared myself into getting more sick and screamed to my brother for help, by the time I muttered out what was going on he was frantic, he didn't know what to do, he was so upset he was asking me what do I do? He threw a wet rag over my forehead and called mum at work asking her what to do, eventually the answer was call 000 ill come straight home.
Daniel then called 000 and told them what was happening, after he hung up he put his forehead against mine and told me I would be ok, he was shaking so much, crying and frightened, I didn't know what to do so I just grabbed his hand and apologies to him, told him I loved him and said sorry over and over again, then promised him I would do something about the weight.
I don't remember him saying anything else till mum came home.
By the time mum got home (which was about 10 minutes) I was feeling better, a few minutes later the paramedics and a mica crew turned up with a 3 lead ECG and checked my vitals, turns out my heart was not the cause of my condition, they offered to take me to hospital and I spent the night there. That reminds me... I have access to my own pcr at work, I know who the paramedics were I would like to personally thank them for what they did for me, they do such amazing work as do the nurses, SES, fire fighters, police, army and anybody that assists the community, you are the proactive people in this world and I am great full for what you all do for us.
Turns out I was discharged with acid reflux, this is when the acid from your stomach climbs up your esophagus and burns you which I'm assuming causes your muscles to tense up or cramp around the area, just like heart burn but worse. I believe they call excessive episodes of this GERD and coincidentally the latest fix for this problem is a gastric bypass because as mentioned in previous blogs your stomach containing your acids are no longer connected to your esophagus thus it's impossible for anyone with the operation to get reflux, heartburn or GERD that doesn't stop anxiety rearing it's ugly head around the corner from time to time however.
That following day I spoke to my brother about what had happened and I said to him that this was the last straw I needed to lose the weight, I couldn't put anybody in that position again, he just looked at me and said "Give it 2 weeks you will forget this happened", I was reluctant to believe him, "when you are ready to lose weight you will lose it, till then just be mindful of those of us who love you, we don't want to see you go through this again and we don't want to experience it again".
A few weeks later I was back to my normal routine and had forgotten about what had happened, well I hadn't quite forgotten it just pushed it back into my mind.
So we fast forward to today, Daniel is proud of what I have accomplished, each time I go to the gym he's always telling me I don't need to go, he says I look fantastic and don't need to improve myself anymore than I already have, he is ecstatic that I now have a life to live and can finally go and live it, so I started with America October 2011, but that story comes later :)
This journey is far from over, physically I have healed from my pain, mentally though not so much and bringing up memories such as this breaks my heart to think about it let alone remembering as much detail as possible to write down, it hurts so much my shirt is covered in tears now, perhaps I should clean myself up and get ready for bed, another big day at work tomorrow.
For what it's worth Daniel, you may not have always been there for me when I was younger, you are my big brother but you never did hold my hand growing up, but when I needed you the most ... you were there for me from the very depths of my heart, that place where no words can every express my gratitude, sometimes the only proper words to say are Thank You and I love you.
Sunday, 8 January 2012
Blog 3, let's see how stupid I can be! Also the secret to weight loss but hey whatever just because it worked for me...
Okie dokie artichokie!
So when you're in hospital you have to stomach as much protean as you can take (small 250 mill bottles and usually 3 a day), to fit them in between meals and keeping up fluids, yeah good luck. I managed one a day then two by the time I was almost discharged.
I might explain the operation before I go into the diet for those still a little unsure about what exactly happens. 9/10ths of your stomach is cut away this is the lower part and only the top most part still attached to your esophagus is left behind, the part cut away is stitched up so it won't leak and it continues to seep stomach acids into your bowel to assist with food digestion.
Ok now your intestines (Alignment or roux limb {see pic below}) are cut in two and directly attached to the new (1/10th) stomach (bypass), the remaining intestine is stitched into the side of the intestine for the stomach acids to flow as normal.
Confused? Good so was I, it's hard without a diagram so look at this instead.
http://bestfitbariatrics.com/images/Gastric-Bypass.jpg
Protean is essential for the first few months, protean (as many gym junkies know) is one of the best healing agents available on the market, and considering what it does it's pretty cheap.
You are given a diet timetable of when you can start trying more solid foods and how often per day, so the first 2 weeks was liquids only, broth, soups ect... by the third week I was introducing crackers into my diet, then by the fourth week you can start eating soft solids, so fish or anything that's been sitting in a broth for hours. Then as the weeks go on you start going back to solids, by week 6 your pretty much back on solids eating whatever you can stomach and loving the fact you don't have to have liquid meals anymore but keep up that protean, Up and Go's were it for me 2 a day between water and food it made it really hard to keep this up every day. There you go though, that's what you can expect post operation.
So 4 weeks after the operation (3 weeks at home) I decided that I was feeling really good and wanted to go back to work, well we all make mistakes, it's just too bad that when you do it this soon post op that it can actually throw you back in your healing which does more harm than good (obviously).
I catch the bus to work, a 1 hour long bus ride of heavy stops and starts and shaking seats, by the time I got to work that morning I was in excruciating pain, so I popped a lot of pain killers to ease it, this did the trick for a few hours but by lunch I had to leave as the scar tissue flared up again.
Another hour long bus ride back home brought me to tears, no amount of pain killers helped this time, I went home eventually fell asleep and the next two weeks are a blur, I honestly don't remember it, perhaps I slept through most of it? Who knows. Don't rush healing after an operation you can set things back weeks/months all you need to do is sit on your arse for another fortnight and see how things turn out.
----------------
So that's all I have to say about that for now, I really wouldn't mind some questions from anybody reading these blogs, anything scratching at your thought process that you would like to know more about?
Now the time you've all been weighting (see what I did there! =)) for, the secret to weight loss.
There are four things you need to do when trying to lose weight.
Note: These are in no order of importance, they are all equally important.
1) You -have- to admit to having a problem, this makes you more compatible in accepting change and allowing your willpower to control your actions. If your mind isn't ready do not even try to change your lifestyle! This can be said for anything, smoking, drinking, gambling, whatever.
Perfect example, I know somebody who was forced into one of the (three) operations available, what do I mean by forced? If they didn't lose weight they would die within a few months, pretty bad.
Now because they were forced into this decision and did not openly accept it, after almost a year post op, things aren't looking good for them, they aren't gaining weight but old habits are causing issues like high cholesterol and blood pressure from eating the wrong foods and eating incorrectly as per operation rules.
Rules post operation for eating: Simple, chew your food really well so it doesn't get stuck. Also while your at it, don't throw up your food so you can continue eating the mass amounts you used to because you miss it.
That last one is what's happening... it's upsetting however this and other things can and will happen if you are forced into something you do not want. I think they call it rejection, one of our most simplest emotions but one of the most powerful. We did it all the time as kids, your parents would tell you to do something you do the opposite, why would this be different? Your forced into a situation you didn't want of course your not going to accept it.
2) You must put yourself first! Before family, before children, before friends, before your video games or band or work, whatever.. You must be the first person in your life.
It's a simple concept really and I like to think of it this way (apologies if i sound arrogant in this next part) "Who the hell are you to take care of anybody else when you can't even take care of yourself!"
I tell you, being on this side of the fence now I can see this statement for it's true meaning and it hits home to those who are truly ready for change. Those of you who are annoyed you are not ready for change yet when the day comes that you will accept it, you will reflect on this statement and read between it's lines for it's true meaning.
3) Do yourself a favor and learn to calorie count, there are apps on iphones now that can do it for you.
Look you don't need to become a Michelle Bridges and count every single unit of intake as long as you have a good idea on how much you are eating you can compare that to how many calories you burn during your exercise routines.
4) Shock your system (no don't go electrocuting yourself now), before your body get's a chance to become comfortable with the change you made, throw it into overdrive by making a distinctive change.
The below example is not one you should do, but take as reference.
Cutting out carbs and go for brisk walks every second night.
Cut out oils and fats from your diet and eat some carbs, now go on a rowing machine or cross trainer.
Eat mass amounts of protean and go weight training
Go vegan with high intensity cardio
See the above example is all about shocking your system so you -shouldn't- plateau as quickly as you might when losing weight. But hey at the end of the day we are all different, because I haven't plateaued yet after 90kgs doesn't mean everybody else can do that. Oh and quick note with the gastric bypass the expected plateau range is after 50% weight loss, I'm currently at 80%.
That in all honesty is the secret to weight loss, your GP and personal trainer and a nutritionist should all be informed on any lifestyle change before going out and performing rigorous exercise or changing foods that may actually be keeping you regular and happy inside.
Thanks for reading,
Big Age.
Remember any questions or comments you can email me directly evileldrin@gmail.com or add me on facebook if you haven't already you can find me under Adrian Cuvello
So when you're in hospital you have to stomach as much protean as you can take (small 250 mill bottles and usually 3 a day), to fit them in between meals and keeping up fluids, yeah good luck. I managed one a day then two by the time I was almost discharged.
I might explain the operation before I go into the diet for those still a little unsure about what exactly happens. 9/10ths of your stomach is cut away this is the lower part and only the top most part still attached to your esophagus is left behind, the part cut away is stitched up so it won't leak and it continues to seep stomach acids into your bowel to assist with food digestion.
Ok now your intestines (Alignment or roux limb {see pic below}) are cut in two and directly attached to the new (1/10th) stomach (bypass), the remaining intestine is stitched into the side of the intestine for the stomach acids to flow as normal.
Confused? Good so was I, it's hard without a diagram so look at this instead.
http://bestfitbariatrics.com/images/Gastric-Bypass.jpg
Protean is essential for the first few months, protean (as many gym junkies know) is one of the best healing agents available on the market, and considering what it does it's pretty cheap.
You are given a diet timetable of when you can start trying more solid foods and how often per day, so the first 2 weeks was liquids only, broth, soups ect... by the third week I was introducing crackers into my diet, then by the fourth week you can start eating soft solids, so fish or anything that's been sitting in a broth for hours. Then as the weeks go on you start going back to solids, by week 6 your pretty much back on solids eating whatever you can stomach and loving the fact you don't have to have liquid meals anymore but keep up that protean, Up and Go's were it for me 2 a day between water and food it made it really hard to keep this up every day. There you go though, that's what you can expect post operation.
So 4 weeks after the operation (3 weeks at home) I decided that I was feeling really good and wanted to go back to work, well we all make mistakes, it's just too bad that when you do it this soon post op that it can actually throw you back in your healing which does more harm than good (obviously).
I catch the bus to work, a 1 hour long bus ride of heavy stops and starts and shaking seats, by the time I got to work that morning I was in excruciating pain, so I popped a lot of pain killers to ease it, this did the trick for a few hours but by lunch I had to leave as the scar tissue flared up again.
Another hour long bus ride back home brought me to tears, no amount of pain killers helped this time, I went home eventually fell asleep and the next two weeks are a blur, I honestly don't remember it, perhaps I slept through most of it? Who knows. Don't rush healing after an operation you can set things back weeks/months all you need to do is sit on your arse for another fortnight and see how things turn out.
----------------
So that's all I have to say about that for now, I really wouldn't mind some questions from anybody reading these blogs, anything scratching at your thought process that you would like to know more about?
Now the time you've all been weighting (see what I did there! =)) for, the secret to weight loss.
There are four things you need to do when trying to lose weight.
Note: These are in no order of importance, they are all equally important.
1) You -have- to admit to having a problem, this makes you more compatible in accepting change and allowing your willpower to control your actions. If your mind isn't ready do not even try to change your lifestyle! This can be said for anything, smoking, drinking, gambling, whatever.
Perfect example, I know somebody who was forced into one of the (three) operations available, what do I mean by forced? If they didn't lose weight they would die within a few months, pretty bad.
Now because they were forced into this decision and did not openly accept it, after almost a year post op, things aren't looking good for them, they aren't gaining weight but old habits are causing issues like high cholesterol and blood pressure from eating the wrong foods and eating incorrectly as per operation rules.
Rules post operation for eating: Simple, chew your food really well so it doesn't get stuck. Also while your at it, don't throw up your food so you can continue eating the mass amounts you used to because you miss it.
That last one is what's happening... it's upsetting however this and other things can and will happen if you are forced into something you do not want. I think they call it rejection, one of our most simplest emotions but one of the most powerful. We did it all the time as kids, your parents would tell you to do something you do the opposite, why would this be different? Your forced into a situation you didn't want of course your not going to accept it.
2) You must put yourself first! Before family, before children, before friends, before your video games or band or work, whatever.. You must be the first person in your life.
It's a simple concept really and I like to think of it this way (apologies if i sound arrogant in this next part) "Who the hell are you to take care of anybody else when you can't even take care of yourself!"
I tell you, being on this side of the fence now I can see this statement for it's true meaning and it hits home to those who are truly ready for change. Those of you who are annoyed you are not ready for change yet when the day comes that you will accept it, you will reflect on this statement and read between it's lines for it's true meaning.
3) Do yourself a favor and learn to calorie count, there are apps on iphones now that can do it for you.
Look you don't need to become a Michelle Bridges and count every single unit of intake as long as you have a good idea on how much you are eating you can compare that to how many calories you burn during your exercise routines.
4) Shock your system (no don't go electrocuting yourself now), before your body get's a chance to become comfortable with the change you made, throw it into overdrive by making a distinctive change.
The below example is not one you should do, but take as reference.
Cutting out carbs and go for brisk walks every second night.
Cut out oils and fats from your diet and eat some carbs, now go on a rowing machine or cross trainer.
Eat mass amounts of protean and go weight training
Go vegan with high intensity cardio
See the above example is all about shocking your system so you -shouldn't- plateau as quickly as you might when losing weight. But hey at the end of the day we are all different, because I haven't plateaued yet after 90kgs doesn't mean everybody else can do that. Oh and quick note with the gastric bypass the expected plateau range is after 50% weight loss, I'm currently at 80%.
That in all honesty is the secret to weight loss, your GP and personal trainer and a nutritionist should all be informed on any lifestyle change before going out and performing rigorous exercise or changing foods that may actually be keeping you regular and happy inside.
Thanks for reading,
Big Age.
Remember any questions or comments you can email me directly evileldrin@gmail.com or add me on facebook if you haven't already you can find me under Adrian Cuvello
Thursday, 5 January 2012
It's the second blog and am I really out of titles already?
So just to continue with something from the last Blog I posted, I mentioned that going from what could have been me working at NASA to being a below average earner, when I (barely) passed my VCE exams I went to Tafe, firstly because I'm a hands on kind guy and not one to sit in a big room being lectured to. No thanks, not for me. So I studied for 4 years and was lucky enough to score my first 3 month contract job, from there it becomes easier just start bunny hoping around work places and make your way to a long term contract and even permanency. Now days I work for Ambulance Victoria fixing computers, panasonic tough books and dabbing with java and oracle, sql databases, pretty cool field to be in.
I guess the point of all that was that everybody around me believed I was smarter than I felt, either I was ignorant to my intelligence (oxymoron love it!) or too humble for my own good. In fact I was ignorant to my intelligence, my brother would always tell me it's always the Cuvello's running the company and we always get paid peanuts for it, and you know what? He's right too. My dad at the tender age of 12 was working for his father in his pub by 17 he was pretty much running the whole show (so that's what he tells me anyway), my brother was the hardest of 4 others when he was working permanent as a painter many years back and mum was running her brothers camping store after he sold the business to another.
As for me? Well if I took a week off work without being back filled you don't want to know what the ramifications would be to the Ambulance service, I'd rather not scare anyone so I'll just say that what I do is important enough that it does affect lives and thankfully I am back filled when I take leave so I don't have to worry about that :)
So with that off my chest it's a big high five to me, after those years of abuse I still turned out ok, but to be honest I would be lying if I didn't have depressive and suicidal thoughts during that period and even today, yes I maybe more happy with life and I do love the fact I can walk around without back pain and perspiring just walking to the mailbox and back inside but I think that last part of me the mind part needs some work.
The operation works on using your emotions to talk to your brain and determine your level of hunger and fullness, what this also does is cause you to become an emotional wreck, so mood swings, violent outbursts that you don't realise you are doing and then sometimes I just watch a tv show or read a book and burst into tears for no reason at all.. pretty freaky stuff.
So let's go back to the operation, I will assume you have some idea on what happens, (if not I posted links in the first blog that you can read) so it's post op, I'm woken up and the first day is just a blur (obviously) well not really, I almost died that night actually. After the operation I had a deflated left lung, which can happen during the operation, my main problem was the amount of phlegm I was trying to cough up that night and with one lung it's hard enough breathing let alone coughing. So anyway I ended up in a coughing fit that night and didn't have the strength to swallow or cough by the time this phlegm hit my throat so I'm sitting there looking around for the bed buzzer while trying not to stress over the fact I'm choking on this stuff, realising it was too far away the only thing I could think of was, well this ain't gonna happen, I didn't just do all this so I would suffocate on my own juices, so I gritted my teeth and sat up threw myself back onto the bed and exhaled as hard as possible and managed to cover my curtains with well yeah you know what. No amount of tremadole, morphine or whatever else they pumped into me could subside the pain, but I was happy I told the nurse what had happened and she gave me a stern talking to as if I was to blame, I just looked at her and said the curtains a mess, clean it up will you.
Bitch...
That last one I didn't say, but I did mention that the bed buzzer was too far away, so if you find yourself in hospital make it the first on your checklist.
As previously mentioned the hardest thing I had to do was admit I had a problem, well the second hardest thing I had to do was the day 2 post operation x-rays.
I was taken in to this room and God Bless the man who took care of me, he is such a nice guy he helped me out of bed every time I needed to go wash my face and clean up, when my bed was moved between area's he was always there, very chatty person always had a nice thing to say.
That reminds me I should go find out if he's still there, I'd like for him to see me now he too said I was an inspiration for him, perhaps I have underestimated just how important this decision was to make, I knew there was a chance of death, but I think when people say the choice you made I never could, I don't know what that means, even today, I get it when people try to explain it to me but I feel like something is missing, not sure..
Anyway so the second hardest thing I've had to do, these x-rays I had to do standing up, yeah standing up people 20 hours after having my entire stomach and bowel system rearranged I was asked to stand on my own for 5 minutes while they take x-rays. Once again no amount of morphine could help with this pain, standing there felt like an eternity, I was shaking at the knees, sweating profusely and it felt like somebody had a 50kgs weight in my stomach, horrifying experience to say the least.
So that lasted 5 minutes then 7 days later I was finally discharged, nothing exciting happened during this time except for learning to use my lower half again (cathodes have an interesting feeling when removed), learning to walk was fun and tiring at the same time but any chance I got I was up and about with a walking frame trying to move around. The biggest hurdle was my left lung, I was asked to breathe into a straw that was in a cup full of water, blow bubbles that is. It's interested to note just how hard that is to do with only one lung, you can't take a deep breathe, you can't sustain a long exhale and you become light headed very quickly, but after a week it sorted itself out and I was back to normal.
I might stop there for now, the next blog ill talk about the diet I was on post op and my stupidity of trying to go back to work 3 weeks after surgery then realising it should have been 5-6 weeks after the scar tissue flared up and put me on my back for a fortnight.
Thanks for reading,
Big Age.
Remember any questions or comments you can email me directly evileldrin@gmail.com or add me on facebook if you haven't already you can find me under Adrian Cuvello
I guess the point of all that was that everybody around me believed I was smarter than I felt, either I was ignorant to my intelligence (oxymoron love it!) or too humble for my own good. In fact I was ignorant to my intelligence, my brother would always tell me it's always the Cuvello's running the company and we always get paid peanuts for it, and you know what? He's right too. My dad at the tender age of 12 was working for his father in his pub by 17 he was pretty much running the whole show (so that's what he tells me anyway), my brother was the hardest of 4 others when he was working permanent as a painter many years back and mum was running her brothers camping store after he sold the business to another.
As for me? Well if I took a week off work without being back filled you don't want to know what the ramifications would be to the Ambulance service, I'd rather not scare anyone so I'll just say that what I do is important enough that it does affect lives and thankfully I am back filled when I take leave so I don't have to worry about that :)
So with that off my chest it's a big high five to me, after those years of abuse I still turned out ok, but to be honest I would be lying if I didn't have depressive and suicidal thoughts during that period and even today, yes I maybe more happy with life and I do love the fact I can walk around without back pain and perspiring just walking to the mailbox and back inside but I think that last part of me the mind part needs some work.
The operation works on using your emotions to talk to your brain and determine your level of hunger and fullness, what this also does is cause you to become an emotional wreck, so mood swings, violent outbursts that you don't realise you are doing and then sometimes I just watch a tv show or read a book and burst into tears for no reason at all.. pretty freaky stuff.
So let's go back to the operation, I will assume you have some idea on what happens, (if not I posted links in the first blog that you can read) so it's post op, I'm woken up and the first day is just a blur (obviously) well not really, I almost died that night actually. After the operation I had a deflated left lung, which can happen during the operation, my main problem was the amount of phlegm I was trying to cough up that night and with one lung it's hard enough breathing let alone coughing. So anyway I ended up in a coughing fit that night and didn't have the strength to swallow or cough by the time this phlegm hit my throat so I'm sitting there looking around for the bed buzzer while trying not to stress over the fact I'm choking on this stuff, realising it was too far away the only thing I could think of was, well this ain't gonna happen, I didn't just do all this so I would suffocate on my own juices, so I gritted my teeth and sat up threw myself back onto the bed and exhaled as hard as possible and managed to cover my curtains with well yeah you know what. No amount of tremadole, morphine or whatever else they pumped into me could subside the pain, but I was happy I told the nurse what had happened and she gave me a stern talking to as if I was to blame, I just looked at her and said the curtains a mess, clean it up will you.
Bitch...
That last one I didn't say, but I did mention that the bed buzzer was too far away, so if you find yourself in hospital make it the first on your checklist.
As previously mentioned the hardest thing I had to do was admit I had a problem, well the second hardest thing I had to do was the day 2 post operation x-rays.
I was taken in to this room and God Bless the man who took care of me, he is such a nice guy he helped me out of bed every time I needed to go wash my face and clean up, when my bed was moved between area's he was always there, very chatty person always had a nice thing to say.
That reminds me I should go find out if he's still there, I'd like for him to see me now he too said I was an inspiration for him, perhaps I have underestimated just how important this decision was to make, I knew there was a chance of death, but I think when people say the choice you made I never could, I don't know what that means, even today, I get it when people try to explain it to me but I feel like something is missing, not sure..
Anyway so the second hardest thing I've had to do, these x-rays I had to do standing up, yeah standing up people 20 hours after having my entire stomach and bowel system rearranged I was asked to stand on my own for 5 minutes while they take x-rays. Once again no amount of morphine could help with this pain, standing there felt like an eternity, I was shaking at the knees, sweating profusely and it felt like somebody had a 50kgs weight in my stomach, horrifying experience to say the least.
So that lasted 5 minutes then 7 days later I was finally discharged, nothing exciting happened during this time except for learning to use my lower half again (cathodes have an interesting feeling when removed), learning to walk was fun and tiring at the same time but any chance I got I was up and about with a walking frame trying to move around. The biggest hurdle was my left lung, I was asked to breathe into a straw that was in a cup full of water, blow bubbles that is. It's interested to note just how hard that is to do with only one lung, you can't take a deep breathe, you can't sustain a long exhale and you become light headed very quickly, but after a week it sorted itself out and I was back to normal.
I might stop there for now, the next blog ill talk about the diet I was on post op and my stupidity of trying to go back to work 3 weeks after surgery then realising it should have been 5-6 weeks after the scar tissue flared up and put me on my back for a fortnight.
Thanks for reading,
Big Age.
Remember any questions or comments you can email me directly evileldrin@gmail.com or add me on facebook if you haven't already you can find me under Adrian Cuvello
5th Janurary 2011 - 18 months post operation...
My name is Adrian and I have a problem... the hardest words I have ever spoken, harder than reading at my grandfathers funeral, harder than speaking in front of 300 kids in high school, harder than playing music in front of 100 people at the local pub.
Start Weight @ August 9th 2010 218kgs (479.6lbs) - date of the operation
Todays Weight @ Jan 5th, 2012 130kgs (286lbs) - and counting!
Everybody loves before and after pictures, add me on facebook and take a look for yourself!
http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=628854255
Firstly I'm not great with words, I'm not great with grammar (as I'm sure you can tell) and I can sort of go all over the place, jump from one example to another, I would be writing a book if I could perfect this not write a blog, let's remember that shall we? I'm just here to tell you my story in hopes that it may be able to assist you with your issues, inform you on decisions you may want to make or just to brighten your day.
I've been one of those "big all my life" people, when I was a child I was bigger than my big brother, wider too, I found myself being an A+ student till half way through grade 5. July of 1993 I found myself starting to fail subjects, I would get mad at students and throw tantrums, why you might ask? That was when the kids in my class found out hurtful words that would cause me to rage at them.
I was on the road to success, who knows where I could have gone if this teasing did not occur.
Each and every semester you would see my grades go down faster than Paris Hilton .. uhh sorry I'm trying to keep this clean, ... fast from A+ to D- in 6 months, this continued to Year 12 when eventually these people grew up and finally stopped with all that childish behavior.
So many memories of school, so many bad memories that is. I've managed to block out most of my childhood because of these 7 years, this means that my mothers two amazing parents who passed away during this time are just a flicker in my mind. The two most beautiful people in the world, they cared for everybody and never had a bad word to say about anyone, a smile on there face and a warm hug for me every time I was near them... at least that's what I've been told, I've forgotten them, I can barely remember there faces, when I try to remember there are too many bad memories that cloud my vision, so I don't try anymore, I've accepted it and it's just another burden I will carry throughout my life.
(This would make for a good song hey? It's too bad my MetalBilly band don't sing about this sort of emotional stuff, wait a second.. actually we do! Vent Time!)
I've been asked many times since the operation as a child growing up were you over fed by your parents? Did they feed you bad food and is that what has caused you to be this big?
My reply to this has been and forever will be "since I was old enough to understand what is right and wrong I take full responsibility from that point to today, from that moment I made the choice to continue knowing the consequences", before that time, well like I said I don't remember much however I cannot and will never "blame" anybody for what happened to me, one of the first choices to losing weight is to take responsibility for your actions, unless somebody is forcing you to eat then it's your own damn choice to eat!
So why the blog? Why start so far after your operation?
I did not want to blog at the time because it would be all about how I "felt" how I was "coping" with the operation and it felt too much like a diary to me than a story. I do actually regret not doing this because post operation the one thing I have learned and experienced from this is to listen to my body, to listen and feel my body's reaction to everything that is happening around me.
It may sound a little corny but when you hear about the whole "one mind, body and soul" I can understand this now, pre operation you would never hear me giving a toss about subconscious issues or metal stress, if it wasn't physical it didn't exist, and I sure had enough physical problems back then so that was enough to keep me busy complaining and hating myself.
These days though, well let's just say that my body and soul are one in the same, spiritually I always had a firm grasp of what I believe in and how I want to portray that in my life to others and toward myself and as for my body, well let's just say its like taking the dog out for a walk and the leash is the connection, you would never take the dog off the leash (not in the suburbs anyway, that's what I'm going with here) because it can lead to bad things, I would never go out and not consider the possibility of food getting stuck or perhaps just changing the texture of food to allow easier decent.
Before I wrap this first blog up -some- topics I will cover over in future blogs.
2005 - Heart attack scare (turns out it was acid reflux)
2006 - Weight Watchers! Let's lose weight and count Points!
2007 - Ups and Downs to weight loss.
2008 - Losing weight with a mate!
2009 - Backed into a corner, nowhere to run!
2010 - Acceptance, the hardest decision made!
2011 - The 16km (10mile) hike around Glacial Peak to Currey Village (Yosemite National Park)
2011 - The journey takes a big turn, wow did I really lose 65kgs (143lbs) in one year?
2012 - So what happens now?
Ok so that was a little taste on what's to offer from me and my life, for a read on what operation I had was you can take a look at these two pages.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gastric_bypass_surgery#Dumping_syndrome
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gastric_dumping_syndrome
Dumping syndrome is a side effect of the operation and something you (may) have to life with for the rest of your life. Just one of the many changes you must completed and unconditionally accept before even considering any type of operation. Lap Banding has its side effects, stapling is just barbaric and sleeving doesn't leave much after they cut half your stomach away.
Start Weight @ August 9th 2010 218kgs (479.6lbs) - date of the operation
Todays Weight @ Jan 5th, 2012 130kgs (286lbs) - and counting!
Everybody loves before and after pictures, add me on facebook and take a look for yourself!
http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=628854255
Firstly I'm not great with words, I'm not great with grammar (as I'm sure you can tell) and I can sort of go all over the place, jump from one example to another, I would be writing a book if I could perfect this not write a blog, let's remember that shall we? I'm just here to tell you my story in hopes that it may be able to assist you with your issues, inform you on decisions you may want to make or just to brighten your day.
I've been one of those "big all my life" people, when I was a child I was bigger than my big brother, wider too, I found myself being an A+ student till half way through grade 5. July of 1993 I found myself starting to fail subjects, I would get mad at students and throw tantrums, why you might ask? That was when the kids in my class found out hurtful words that would cause me to rage at them.
I was on the road to success, who knows where I could have gone if this teasing did not occur.
Each and every semester you would see my grades go down faster than Paris Hilton .. uhh sorry I'm trying to keep this clean, ... fast from A+ to D- in 6 months, this continued to Year 12 when eventually these people grew up and finally stopped with all that childish behavior.
So many memories of school, so many bad memories that is. I've managed to block out most of my childhood because of these 7 years, this means that my mothers two amazing parents who passed away during this time are just a flicker in my mind. The two most beautiful people in the world, they cared for everybody and never had a bad word to say about anyone, a smile on there face and a warm hug for me every time I was near them... at least that's what I've been told, I've forgotten them, I can barely remember there faces, when I try to remember there are too many bad memories that cloud my vision, so I don't try anymore, I've accepted it and it's just another burden I will carry throughout my life.
(This would make for a good song hey? It's too bad my MetalBilly band don't sing about this sort of emotional stuff, wait a second.. actually we do! Vent Time!)
I've been asked many times since the operation as a child growing up were you over fed by your parents? Did they feed you bad food and is that what has caused you to be this big?
My reply to this has been and forever will be "since I was old enough to understand what is right and wrong I take full responsibility from that point to today, from that moment I made the choice to continue knowing the consequences", before that time, well like I said I don't remember much however I cannot and will never "blame" anybody for what happened to me, one of the first choices to losing weight is to take responsibility for your actions, unless somebody is forcing you to eat then it's your own damn choice to eat!
So why the blog? Why start so far after your operation?
I did not want to blog at the time because it would be all about how I "felt" how I was "coping" with the operation and it felt too much like a diary to me than a story. I do actually regret not doing this because post operation the one thing I have learned and experienced from this is to listen to my body, to listen and feel my body's reaction to everything that is happening around me.
It may sound a little corny but when you hear about the whole "one mind, body and soul" I can understand this now, pre operation you would never hear me giving a toss about subconscious issues or metal stress, if it wasn't physical it didn't exist, and I sure had enough physical problems back then so that was enough to keep me busy complaining and hating myself.
These days though, well let's just say that my body and soul are one in the same, spiritually I always had a firm grasp of what I believe in and how I want to portray that in my life to others and toward myself and as for my body, well let's just say its like taking the dog out for a walk and the leash is the connection, you would never take the dog off the leash (not in the suburbs anyway, that's what I'm going with here) because it can lead to bad things, I would never go out and not consider the possibility of food getting stuck or perhaps just changing the texture of food to allow easier decent.
Before I wrap this first blog up -some- topics I will cover over in future blogs.
2005 - Heart attack scare (turns out it was acid reflux)
2006 - Weight Watchers! Let's lose weight and count Points!
2007 - Ups and Downs to weight loss.
2008 - Losing weight with a mate!
2009 - Backed into a corner, nowhere to run!
2010 - Acceptance, the hardest decision made!
2011 - The 16km (10mile) hike around Glacial Peak to Currey Village (Yosemite National Park)
2011 - The journey takes a big turn, wow did I really lose 65kgs (143lbs) in one year?
2012 - So what happens now?
Ok so that was a little taste on what's to offer from me and my life, for a read on what operation I had was you can take a look at these two pages.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gastric_bypass_surgery#Dumping_syndrome
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gastric_dumping_syndrome
Dumping syndrome is a side effect of the operation and something you (may) have to life with for the rest of your life. Just one of the many changes you must completed and unconditionally accept before even considering any type of operation. Lap Banding has its side effects, stapling is just barbaric and sleeving doesn't leave much after they cut half your stomach away.
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